Miss you, my dear Andy. What did you do today? Are you staying up tonight for the euro final? I am not because I am not a super fan of football match, but if I was with you and you wanted to watch, I’d definitely stay up with you 😊
I tried a “new” outfit today, mainly because I had to go dinner with my mom’s relatives tonight and they would go crazy if they saw me wearing vest and shorts. So I made this plan to wear a vest and jeans, and when I went for dinner I wore a cardigan on top, hahaha.
It surprisingly worked, especially that I thought I would never be able to wear this jeans because I’ve lost so much weight, but the oversized actually makes it a low waist style, which I think is not so bad. I had my favourite green top on at first but then I thought that was too “inappropriate”:
This was me at 10 in the morning, I looked grumpy and you can see how sleepy I still was with how tilted the selfie turned out to be, haha. In the end, I chose this grey vest instead. This was me coming home after a long day of going to church, a bit of shopping, visiting my chinese doctor, and having the relatives dinner.
I think the outfit looks quite ok on me? What do you think? 🙈
I also took a selfie of the outfit I tried out when I went shopping.
I hope you like my “new” outfit of the weekend and these selfies I got for you.
Today I visited the chinese doctor again. After 4 times, I finally felt less nervous to chat with him for a little bit more. He seems to be a nice guy, it’d be nice to be friend with him. But I’ve thought a lot about it, as tempting as it is (whether it is the doctor or casual dating), I don’t want to hurt anyone including myself by doing anything reckless or irresponsible.
I can and have liked quite a few people, but my “affection” towards them ultimately was motivated by wanting to be loved. That’s why it never ended well - I ended up hurting the other person and disappointing myself.
But my love for you is different. Of course I want you to love me, but that’s not the reason why I love you. I have never met someone I want to love so much just because I love him so much (look, I can’t even explain it properly). Someone I’m willing to pay ridiculous amount for getting on a 5-hour train to visit his hometown, someone I’m willing to work hard for to be a better, more-ready person in the waiting.
I still prefer you, I always do my dear, even I haven’t met you for almost a year.
Miss you a lot, Andy. I hope you know how much I treasure you. Remember you are very loved.
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