Lots to write to you tonight.
So the miracle that I prayed for didn’t happen today — My visa is not ready yet.🥲 I went to the centre this morning and they basically said my passport is still not here, and I can only wait. They said it can take 3-4 weeks, which today is the 3rd week. I was pretty upset and panicked because that means I need to pivot. But then I felt if God doesn’t allow me to fly tomorrow, then maybe He has a better plan for me? And I’m just gonna learn to accept the situation. So I called the travel agency to ask about the cancellation fee after I got home because I figured it might just be safer if I book a flight after I got my visa. Then it turns out I can get fully refunded for my ticket with only 150 HKD administration fee! And I realised that if I book a direct CX flight with my Asia Miles, it will only cost around 10K HKD, which is even cheaper than my original ticket. This back up plan sounds much much better than having to pay an extra 12K, so I felt slightly more relieved.
But of course that would mean my whole family will be flying over first 😅 and I might have to spend a couple of days alone at home. But maybe God thinks that some alone moments away from my family before I head to the UK will be good for me, including the experience of leaving (as in flying off) alone. It kinda scares me a little when I imagine that mental journey that I will need to go through alone but I guess I’ll learn to trust that I can do it if God thinks that I can do it.
There’re also some other bright sides that we are not flying together, that is I can drive them to the airport, and my parents can go visit their friends first before I arrive. But hopefully I can still leave within this week and I can hear about my visa ASAP. I’ll definitely keep you posted.
Another thing that I have to write to you about (even it’s almost 2am now), is that Lovey called me tonight suddenly and we chatted for over 2 hours. She heard that I left Meyer few weeks back but she waited till now to talk because she thought I needed some space. Until tonight she felt the urge to call me so she did. I told her about my study and stuff, then we touched on you. She said she met up with you and you told her about how you had to leave in rush. And then we got deeper into this topic until at a point I felt I could tell her about my side of the story.
I didn’t tell her the details of the whole story but her responses felt reassuring for me, so it was a really good conversation. She offered to be a middle person if I ever want to pass you anything, but I told her that it’s okay that we keep things as how it is now until you feel like reconnecting with me again by any means. I want to maintain this distance that I am offering you now so that you don’t feel pressured to update me on anything through anyone until you are ready to.
She did tell me your dad’s deteriorating situation and that worries me. But I guess there’s not much that I can do aside from continuing to pray for your family. I actually have been wondering in the past few days if you’re still in HK, so I guess she can update me on these important information if needed.
I didn’t feel worse after knowing slightly more about your current situation. And I want you to know that you’ll always have my back even I may not fully know what you are going through at this moment. (Just like how you’d ‘fall’ when we hugged and I’d try to catch you, remember?) It’s okay that you’re still figuring things out, it’s okay you’re stressing out from time to time (just like how I turned on my zzzz mode in the previous post). Remember what I always said — you can take as much time as you need, as much as you need. Meanwhile I will always be by your side, cheering for you in your heart. You can listen to the songs I sing (if you don’t mind how bad they are haha) when you need some strength and peace.
She told me that you mentioned that you’re in love with a girl whom you almost got together with. 🙈 She thought it must be significant enough that you brought it up during the conversation. Thank you for keeping me in your heart.
Love you, a lot. ❤️ Here’s a picture of mine in case you miss me :) Went for a last minute hair cut, dyed my hair back to brown, but it’s not supposed to be curled like what’s in the picture hahaha
Commentaires