Phew…what a long (but also feel short) day I had yesterday. After a night of sleep, I still can’t properly gauge how I feel about yesterday.
Almost everyone in the team came back for my last day. Derek who claimed to have only come in twice this year came back just to join the lunch. And they made me a Siumai main dish + dim sum lunch feast
They gave me a card and tried to make me do a speech. I improvised and then passed it to Jenny haha. I am just too bad at this kind of stuff and I was uncomfortable. Like super. uncomfortable. Jenny said to everyone that I am the first person she’s seen who’ve put so much effort in handover…with documents and files and folders haha. It was indeed very warm to hear and read all the blessings from everyone.
Then it was my turn to distribute my san sui beng. I went around the whole office from reception to 1M to all different departments on 2/F. The pudding is much more popular than the scones haha, but it seems like people were pretty happy so I am relieved. After 45 minutes of socialising, I felt dead. Like I could no longer put up a smile because my face muscles were getting sore lol
I didn’t cry in front of anyone. In fact I knew I wouldn’t cry because I never cry on the spot of any separation. I don’t like how sad goodbyes are so I always try to make it as easy as it can be for everyone.
Jenny gave me a gift and asked me not to open it until I am home because she said I might cry. I couldn’t wait so I opened it during my dinner with rubychu and jojo. Turns out she was right haha, I did shed a tear when I looked at all the small notes she put on each gift. I don’t think I’ve ever felt this touched by a present. (Yes maybe I am not lucky enough to be spoiled by gifts or I am just not a gift person, my standard is not very high haha)
Most of the 8 hours I was busy making sure I finished all my work, showed up and said all the goodbyes. I guess it’s a good thing that I didn’t have much spare time to be nostalgic, except for one moment when I was going to toilet.
I wish you were here. I guess it didn’t feel like a last day because most part of me were gone already too that day when you left. Ever since then it’s like I was there, but I was also not there. It’s such a weird feeling to be around the office without you. But also after yesterday I kind of see the good side that you were not here, that is I got to really focus my mental energy on socialising with everyone else at Meyer, and make sure I don’t miss the chance to properly thank everyone. But having to say goodbye to this place has just become way lighter compared to sending you off.
So what I did yesterday before I went to sleep: I lied on my bed, put on your red check shirt from the front, and I just hugged and kept smelling the shirt, even though there’s actually no smell of you at all (Don’t worry it’s washed), and I just miss you so so much.
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