Hello, nothing special happened to me in the past two days, but I just miss you too much so I decided to keep writing even about the unimportant stuff.
I started cleaning my room and have been throwing away a lot of stuff. It’s such a satisfying experience to look at all the good and bad old stuff and then try to ‘clear up’ the space from the past. My room looks a bit empty now though because I tried to keep as little things on my shelves and desk. It almost feels like I am moving out hahaha.
I also started picking things that I am bringing with me as I room cleaned. Then I found a pack of EXPIRED instant film in my drawer lol, so I decided to print out some photos that I can put somewhere at my place in Kingston, and I got this :)
Thought of carrying this with me in my bag but I worried my mom might find it hahaha, guess I can only put it up after they are goneeee
We didn’t take much photo together and this is my favourite because it was taken at my favourite hiking spot. I’ve always imagined that I could bring my partner one day and share this view with him. And you (kind of) made that happened. I still remember you asked me what I usually do when I am up here, and I said I’ll sit on that rock and think about life. Then you said you’ll do that together with me next time. I don’t think I showed you but I was actually very touched when you said it, because I’ve always wanted to find someone who’s willing to sit next to me at a nice view and just wander. It is sad to think that that ‘next time’ isn’t happening before I leave, but I know that the ‘next time’ is not about the place or the physical presence, but the memories that keep me feel connected even when you’re not next to me. And then I will imagine you by my side when I feel I need a company. Okay now I miss you too much it’s overwhelming me. Let me show you something elseeee.
I also found a bunch of old photos when I cleaned up, and thought you would want to see how dumb and timid little Hannah is:
I feel you can already tell how moody I am from I was small, from looking confident, to that cynical face for a kindergarten student photo, to me happily forcing a bear to hug me (looks like I’ve always liked 🐻), to trying to be girly and photoed with flowers lol (I am pretty sure that my dad made me do it).
Aside from all the never ending clean up, I went to visit a doctor today to ask about potential follow up with my intestines inflammation. He is actually the boss of my friend who works in the Hospital Authority, and he is super nice. He explained the details of my reports, and gave me extra medicine in case I have eczema again. Basically he said if I don’t feel unwell again, it might just be an one-off inflammation, so for now I can just observe and try to maintain a healthy diet after I go there.
I really enjoy writing to you before I go to bed. It makes me feel I just ‘talked’ to you about my day. Love you.
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