:(

hello dear, miss you. How did you spend your Saturday?

For me, I met Jojo and ah Wing this morning for brunch. We went to my favourite fishball noodles place in shaukeiwan. Jojo took a photo of me with my bowl. I look a bit sleepy.

After that, I went to kwuntong for my vocal class in the afternoon. It’s actually been 1.5 months since I had my last class because I went for the trip and after that I got sick. In fact even today, I was still coughing and couldn’t really sing during my class.

It made me feel really sad and frustrated actually. I was already not a good singer in the first place, but right now I feel I sing even worse, and I don’t even know if it’s only because my voice is not in good condition because I’ve been coughing a lot, or I lost some of my vocal skills that I learnt because I haven’t practiced for awhile.

And for me, singing is more than just a hobby, but a way for me to regulate my emotions. Sometimes I have some emotions bottled up and don’t know how to express or ventilate them, and singing is like an alternative to crying for me.

But now because I couldn’t sing and that made me feel even more frustrated, I get even more emotional and the only way for me to let them out is by crying. So..I cried a lot today after I got home :(

I tried to comfort myself that I will get better soon and my voice will recover eventually, and I can always practice and get my skills back. But I still just kept crying and crying. I feel like I have to because this has become the only way for me to release my emotions for now.

I miss you even more on a day like this, because you always know how to bring me happiness in moment like this and remind me not to be too harsh on myself whenever I get frustrated with myself.

Miss you, me earlier today.