Today is the second day of the trip. We stayed in Bangkok last night and headed to Pattaya area where the factory is at today.
I feel pretty manageable and at ease with Edison so far. I have learnt to constantly remind myself that it’s okay to be my true self in front of him and I think I am now less “stressed” or nervous about thinking that he might be secretly judging me for whatever I do. When I am not trapped by my own mind that way, I find that I feel easier to talk only when I want to, say things that might be random or not thought out, ask questions that might seem silly.
There were still some awkward moments. For example when we were checking in at the hotel yesterday, the staff looked surprised that we book separate rooms. We also spent some time resting on the sofa in his room after checking in, it was weird to be looking at the beds while we were sitting on the sofa talking. And when we had dinner early tonight, there was one prawn left that he asked me to have it, I said I don’t mind having it but I am too lazy to peel it. He ended up peeling it for me.
He actually takes very good care of me so far. He always asks me what I want to eat then gives suggestions of food and coffee wherever we go, orders and pays for everything, searches for places to massage and leads the way. He also communicates with people in Thai so I barely have to speak.
The me in the past would probably fall for that or fantasise that he has feelings for me. But now I know him enough that he’s just being nice as a friend, at most a brother. The reality is, I also don’t feel like falling for him again. Like I said before, I am genuinely glad with where we landed and I hope to keep it that way.
We visited a weed store that looks quite cool near our hotel. We didn’t buy anything. But something turned out unexpected from this.
I sent that photo to my Chinese doctor on IG and said it reminded me of what he said to me. He replied me immediately not to try it, but at the same time requested to follow me using his personal account. Then he DM me from there saying his boss from the clinic can actually see what’s on that doctor account (and obviously he’s not supposed to have said I should try weed).
And we begin chatting on IG since then. He still “jokingly” recommended me to try the weed gummy, and we talked about more other stuff. This gives me a chance to have a glimpse of his personal life from his IG profile, he seems so wild that feels nothing like the nice and gentle doctor that I know (just like how he would recommend me to try weed). He doesn’t seem to be a good guy and I don’t seem to be his type anyway. But I just can’t help texting with him. It helps distract me from Edison and I guess I just have the tendency to be attracted by bad guys.
Comments