✈️

Will be missing you a lot on the flight. Love you.

-- Landed update (12/1) --

I landed London last night, I almost forgot how tiring long haul flights are. I couldn't sleep much during this flight and had a lot of time thinking.

When my brother dropped me off at the airport in HK, he asked me why I have to stay in the UK for so long. The question struck me because I actually haven't properly thought about what to expect in this trip.

I know I'll have to attend my graduation, go up to Manchester to do house viewing with my mom, and go to Frankfurt for work. But all these are just things that I have to check off and they don't actually take up a whole month. I will still be spending a lot of time alone and doing 'nothing'.

When I landed, there was a moment that I felt really really scared. I think that fear came from many places in my heart. I went through a lot of heavy emotions in the UK, those nightmares of mental breakdowns, the loneliness and emptiness. I also left this place with a lot of regrets and pain last time because of Edwin. Like I mentioned many time, I need a lot of healing.

So during my flight I was actually thinking, perhaps what I need to set for this trip is not 'goals', but instead an open heart to have conversations with myself and make room for God to work within me, whether it is to strengthen my heart or to bring healing.

I am sure I will feel a lot during this trip, good or bad. And I am sure I will miss you a lot a lot here. Hugs 🫂

PS. Me waiting for my cousin to pick me up at Heathrow while I write this to you.