Parents’ Dday

hello dear, how are you?

Sorry that I didn’t write here in the last few days. My period is here and even though the period isn’t the worst I had, I have been really drowsy and dizzy for the last these days. I don’t know if it’s because I cried too much, that’s why I let myself rest as much as I can whenever I am calm enough to. I think I feel slightly better today.

After 10 weeks of staying in HK, my parents left this evening to go back to the UK. They had 4 medium/large luggage and 2 small luggage with them. Our car can’t fit that many luggage and they insisted taking the airport bus, so my brother and I only sent them off from the bus stop downstairs our home.

I feel that I hold a lot of complicated mixed feelings at this moment. I am kinda relieved that we get to have some space and freedom once again, which is really what I need right now to recover from the Japan trip. I always think that some healthy distance is actually better for family relationship. But watching them go also makes me feel a bit sad, especially this time that they came back, I could really notice that my dad is getting older and older. I can’t help worrying about them to live in the UK by themselves.

I’ve been thinking about a lot of things lately about the future even though it overwhelms me a lot. I’ve been avoiding that in the last 1-2 years with really good excuses, like because I was still taking time to get better mentally and most of my time and energy was spent on supporting my parents in transition to settle in the UK last year. But I just feel like in the coming month (April), I really hope to spend some time and energy to figure things out, for myself this time, not for my parents or anyone else.

It will be a challenging and stressful process for me, because as you know, I am good at dealing with anything except myself. But I know that God will be with me and shed light on me as I go through this, and I will try to share my thoughts with you too.

I think about you, Andy. Good night.