The busy weekend with friends

hello my dear, how was your weekend? I miss yoooou.

I had a “busy” weekend to meet with some friends because one of my secondary school friends who moved to Taiwan came back to HK to visit. She always said she missed hanging out with us, so I deliberately spared more time for her for two days in a row even though I usually would make sure I have enough me time during the weekend to recharge.

But secretly for this two days, I actually felt really “nervous” waking up in the morning, not because of anything, but just because I worry I will somehow be triggered or drained by spending too much time with my friends and have a mental breakdown. It might sound silly, but I was so “scared”/stressed (I don’t even know how to describe that feeling) that I actually had to cry it out in order to relief myself before getting out of bed in the morning.

Whenever I behave like that, I know it’s time I have to do some self talk with myself. I know that I have these stressful feelings because deep down I have some expectations on myself to be a good company to the people around me. That is why I bake banana bread and have been drawing Christmas cards for my friends because I want to share love with people around me during this Christmas season. But I also know sometimes I will feel incapable of doing that whenever my cynical, “dark” side that felt hurt by the world takes grip on me.

As I laid out these vulnerable thoughts I have, I felt God came through to comfort and encourage me. The words that I felt in my heart were: You don’t have to be perfect to love.

I know I keep questioning myself because I think I didn’t do good enough in the past when it comes to friendships. I also went through a period of time where I totally isolated myself. But I feel God is encouraging me that it is a process that I can keep practicing and get better each time. As I do that, I’ll feel more comfortable and confident to express my care and love for others and be genuine again with people. And most importantly, when I am reminded that my source of love for others is from the overwhelming love I experience from God, I know that I will always have plenty to give.

So that was how I managed my supposedly overwhelming weekend that has a lot of socialising with a relieved mindset. Let me share some photos with you :)

This was Saturday, they are my secondary school friends.

And today, that friend who came from Taiwan went to church with me because she said she wants to experience some Christmas atmosphere

Remember the food donation campaign from

my church that I mentioned before? After the church service, she went to grocery shopping with me and we dropped the food off at church, it was sooo heavy that’s why I had this ugly look haha

We went shopping afterwards, I bought a lot of stuff and she likes to secretly take photos of me, haha. It’s good because then I can share these really raw and ugly photos with you :)

Last one - this was a random one she took at church after the service. I quite like it, because I look quite natural, hehe.

I also received my first birthday present today from my friend :) I haven’t unwrapped it because I want to wait till after Christmas.

Miss you a lot, my dear Andy. Know that I think a lot about you too during this weekend while I was with my friends 🤍 I hope you stay warm these days (and now it makes me want to hug you 🥺)